Realization

To give, to get,
To express or hide,
Regretting, holding pride,
It's a choice,

To help, to take away,
To offer or ignore,
Push aside, reassure,
It's character,

To be sleeping with no emotion,
Or a new butterfly fresh from the cocoon,

A reflection of who you are.

Two Faced

          When you are nondescript to everyone, including your own husband you become lonely. People tend to push limits to satisfy the attention they crave. Curley’s wife attends “Of Mice and Men” as a character drenched with a reputation as a pretentious whore. In reality, her life’s ambition is to be treated like she matters to someone.

            In the beginning, Curley’s wife appears to be self absorbed, coming off as stuck up. When she ended up not receiving the letter from this guy who told her she would be a GREAT actress, she settled with Curley soon after hoping for attention this way. Steinbeck is expressing her importance by emphasizing her demand for respect from everyone on the farm. This is clearly shown when she belittles Crooks because he must not realize what she “can do to him.”

            Curley’s wife was quickly obsessed with the idea of continued adoration. She didn’t care if a bad reputation was included on this deal, she wanted to be noticed. Just like when Lennie first saw her, he was “fascinated”, and she loved it. Curley’s wife was accused of giving some of the workers “the eye.”  Even if she did, it was because it made her feel good about herself. She came looking for Curley in the barn when she entered “she put her hands behind her back and leaned against the door frame so her body was thrown forward.” This is her way of crying out to someone. If she can’t get attention by being herself, that only leaves one option.

            Last, Curley’s lady isn’t whoever one made her out to be. Lennie was the only person on the farm who looked at her, so she took advantage. The few encounters she has had with Lennie, he listened without judgement. She told him the story about becoming and actress “to see if she was impressing him.” Even though he didn’t make conversation, he didn’t ignore her completely which temporarily satisfied her thirst.

          In the deep dark abyss of her heart she just longed to be loved just like her childhood fantasies. She wants to exist to someone. Obviously she never had the feeling of someone caring about her opinions or her thoughts, so she went about fulfilling that by flirting.

Best of Both

            A few miles outside of the city, my house sits on the country side. In front of the two story beauty is a pond carved into the Earth by God’s perfect hand. Pine trees perform as body guards surrounding the fields of the freshly turned hay.

            Just a few moments before I walked out on my back porch, a cloud came through to drop off a gift. The air still lingered with the cleanliness that pierced the back of my throat. It still had the heavy texture to the air almost as if I could shape my own masterpiece. I gazed out to the lush field and saw the variety of flowers and grasses perk up and sing to the sky once more. I suddenly caught a familiar scent of smoked barbeque from my house triggering the past. As I looked beyond “the protectors”, and I focused a little closer, I found there was a deeper meaning in the painted sky. Below, the storm was dark, dreadful, and disastrous, the only part that we can see. It almost reminded me of hell, expressing a sense of belittlement and fear.  Above, the cloud was gorgeous! All I saw was blinding bright lights intertwined with a light lavender and a delicate rosy tinge. To me this resembled Heaven effusing peace and trustworthiness. But there was a line isolating these two contrasting pictures. The line was almost playing a role of Earth. Earth has the best of both, the good and bad need each other to define what either of them really are.

After I came back to reality, I noticed I was outside for thirty minutes, so I took a picture so I could always remember the moment I came to conclusions about many problems. This way of nature put me at peace with myself.

Why us?...

Now that I look back. I notice most of the wars or terrorist attacks has to do with some country and America. I understand that our people actually have rights and opppurtunities, but we are trying to make a better place for our people. We don't want conflict in the mean time. What they don't understand is when traggic happens we don't go hide in a hole, we get back at them twice as hard proving "our country is strong." The reason they are out to get America is because we are very powerful and they are jealous, so they think if a small country conquers us then they will be looked upon. We are the "brightest beacon" not just because of our freedom and rights but because we stand together by fighting and helping the injured in any way.

I AM Poems

I am a barrel racing blonde
I wonder how this will turn out
I hear the calm whisper of the patient wind
I see the dirt roll in heaps as we turn
I want to beat and succeed
I am a barrel racing blonde

I pretend it's only Mocha and I
I feel the heat linger on her sweaty neck
I touch the leather saddle horn for a brief second
I worry this last turn will be too narrow
I cry on the inside because my fear came true
I am a barrel racing blonde

I understand everyone has their good and bad days
I say "it's just one little thing that won't happen next time"
I dream of the perfect race
I try to beat my record
I hope I will persevere
I am a barrel racing blonde

Power of Dreams

            Whenever I saw for my next journal entry that I would have to read a book, I was quite unhappy. I knew I was going to have to do it anyway, so I went ahead and went to the website to pick out a book. I scanned down the list and my mouth dropped when I saw “Alice's Adventures in Wonderland” by Lewis Caroll. I absolutely loved this story! I have never actually read the book, but I have seen a few different versions of it. I knew I could interpret parts of the book in countless ways.

            At the exact moment that I read the title of this book, it took me back to when I was five years old where I always had some fairy tale or a story line that I got from my dreams to act out as play during my childhood. More specifically, this book triggered my favorite dream which I always called Pegasus Land. It usually started by an enormous tree, and I found a path of hoof prints close by my feet leading to this tree. I followed the dirt path and walked through the door that kept me on the outside. I sprinted up to the spiral trail that climbed up the center of the oak tree. When I got to the top, I was greeted by a jet black Friesian stallion, Spaz. He spoke, welcomed me, and said they have been waiting for me. Spaz gave me a tour of the rest of the place. When we reached the tree top, an unbelievable amount of Pegasus were in their nests and were flying all around. Eventually I got used to it the place, and obtained my own Pegasus, Mocha. Once I got used to flying and attacking, we headed out to save the rest of the herds that the humans had captured. When I first had this dream I started going outside with my horse and would pretend the whole thing happened in real life!

            For Alice, Wonderland happened in her dream where the characters and reality of the real world combined with the unconscious state of Alice. To show, Alice heard the soft sweet bellowing of the cattle and took place of the Mock Turtle’s cries, and the voice of the shepherd boy to the place of the Queen’s disturbing whine. Sometimes an environment can influence your dreams. For instance, when you fall asleep in a place where there is an abundance of noise, those sounds can seep into your dreams. Alice lived on a farm so all of the noises she heard in her sleep could easily overlap into her dreams.

            The cause and effect that happened to Alice showed the things that you will have to adjust to while you get older and loose your childhood innocence. In Chapter One, she dealt with either being too big or too small to enter the garden. Alice lost control over her body when her neck grows to an uncontrollable length in Chapter Five. When Alice drastically changed physically, she was scared and unsure in discomfort. Those are some issues she would have conflict with while maturing.

             Curiosity could have been Alice’s last thought because she ate, drank, and went into random places all because of the rushed white rabbit. Wonderland is a great fiction story for kids to learn that curiosity can have a bad outcome and some things that the future has in store.

Sharp Knife of a Short Life

             I see my grandma almost everyday and every time I look at her, she looks at me and smiles. I can always tell when it bugs her. The glistening tear surrounds her eye, her fingers develop a sense of anxiety, and she gives me THAT look when she thinks I’m asleep. The thing is, when I get past that huge brick wall I actually see what is going on in that crazy head of hers, but when I do there is no turning back. This is shown well by The Band Perry song, 'If I Die Young'.

            When I say “IT” that’s what I mean because if IT is mentioned any other way there is just a big silence for a little while. IT happened twenty-five years ago. My grandparents used to live out in the boonies, and so my dad (age 17) and his friend (age 17) were going to go drive around one night. My dad’s little brother (my uncle, age 11), Jody, wanted to go along, and you know how moms are. Even though my dad didn’t want him to, he tagged along. A man fell asleep driving a truck and met them head on while crossing a bridge. The accident killed my dad’s best friend and my uncle. I may not have seen what happened (since I wasn’t even born) but I see how much it has affected others. I do know how much I would’ve liked to have known my uncle.

            This was the catastrophe that ran through my head the entire three minutes and forty-two seconds of this song. I was with her the very first time either of us heard it and saw how she reacted. It’s funny how the right words can be put together and makes your heart ache, and how someone dying at a young age strikes everyone harder.

            “I’ll be wearing white, when I come into your kingdom.” Even though children can mess up big time, in His eyes we are still full of innocence, purity, and wholesomeness. “Gather up your tears, keep ‘em in your pocket save them for a time when you’re really gonna need them.” Although people shed tears due to the loss of a loved one, they should know that they are happier where they are at.

            Sometimes some of us do not even get to say our temporary goodbyes. We should all enjoy the time together because one day you may not have that, and no one needs to look back and regret what they have done.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aw8W6hYGZ0E

How to Prevent Foal Rejection

"How to Prevent Foal Rejection"

            Horses are elegant creatures and very smart, but no one really knows what goes on in that big head. For all we know, they could understand us completely and talk back and maybe they do in their own way. Though horses show behaviors to display communication with humans, a mares bond with her foal is even more evident. Unfortunately this bond is not always present in some mares and the foal's survival depends on the mare's actions. A lack of this bond is called foal rejection. There are a few reasons why this happens but fortunately we know enough on how to prevent it.

            When something does not click right in the mare’s head to protect and care for her foal, people step in to help her understand. A common cause of foal rejection is fear. The mare is scared of a new something suddenly in her space. When a mare goes into labor for the first time she feels pain and discomfort, then it quickly ends, and she stands up and then there is a new unfamiliar creature in the stall with her. Don’t allow the baby to approach her, let the mare approach him. Part of this fear results when the foal staggers to reach her, and she kicks because she cannot get away from this unfamiliar creature to her. This is when people come in to hold the foal down to show her it won’t harm her. After a little while the mother will get used to the sight, smell, and the sound of the new baby. As her curiosity develops, the mare approaches to sniff at the baby. Finally, she licks the foal, which triggers an immediate realization the baby is hers. She then understands and takes possession of him. This method makes sense to me to show her that the foal meant no harm.

            Another reason a mare may neglect a foal is having a painful udder. In this particular case, the mother does want the baby, but there is pain in her udder which causes her to kick when the baby nurses. Even if the foal is in no harm after several kicks, the mare’s behavior could increase into rejection. To eliminate that possibility you could milk the mare to reduce the pressure, and then bottle feed it to the foal. Another solution is to administer diuretic drugs to quickly reduce the pressure and swelling to relieve the pain. Since a veterinarian needs to be present this is a great medical treatment.

            Sometimes even nature makes mistakes, and in this specific situation nature did not give the mare knowledge about her future baby. I think it is interesting how man researched and experimented, so they can find ways to help her understand and identify her foal.

            Although foal rejection does not occur very often, it does happen and can have a devastating outcome. A rejected foal would not survive in the wild, but with the interventions with people many foals are saved.

           

peyton's pony

peyton's pony, a photo by Peyton Evans on Flickr.

Pre-AP Assignment 1